Sunday Shot Clock

 Don't you feel sorry for all of the Democrats who had to abandon religion when Trump came out in favor of it?

Opposing regime change in Iran is coming out in support of a dictatorship that slaughters dissidents and wants to destroy Israel. It is supporting the same people who held scores of Americans hostage over the last 47 years. Of course, American liberals support the Iranian government.

Trump is making war on Iran to end their drive to have nuclear weapons. This follows the attempts by Badass Barack Obama and Brain Tumor Biden to bribe the Iranians out of building a nuclear bomb. Obama was recently quoted as saying, "If I knew then what I know now, I would have sent out two planes full of money in the middle of the night!" Biden was quoted as saying, "Little girl smell like Hunter's room on crack night when Jill sleeps there."

Democrats are denying that their proposed campaign slogan in 2028 is a reminder of what they have insisted that blacks call them for the last 300 years. Yes, they claim that "MASA" is neither a reminder of the master/slave relationship nor a takeoff on the Trump "MAGA" slogan. Dims insist that "MASA" is the most honest political slogan in their history. In a press conference seen by the 127 people who watch MSNOW, Dims unfurled an enormous banner reading "Make America Suck Again". 

When asked for comment on the new slogan, perennial presidential candidate Kameltoe Harris was quoted as saying, "I will drink to that!"

Why are colleges and universities spending millions of dollars buying NIL (Name, Image, Likeness) rights from college athletes? Why are they squandering millions of dollars when their players' mugshots are free as a matter of public record? It's not like those guys are spending that money on books or tutors.

Let's just go ahead and label college sports teams as minor league teams. The NCAA doesn't care as long as they get their cut. Things are so bad in college sports that there are players changing teams more often than they change sports cars.

A couple of weeks ago a University of Georgia football player was arrested for blocking a sidewalk outside of a bar at 1:00 AM. A policeman ordered him to move and he refused. Even Otis on the Andy Griffith Show knew better than that. Off he went to jail. Thanks, Barney!!

Because so many UGA athletes have been arrested over the last few years, some people are accusing the Athens-Clark County police of "predatory policing". I think that it is a AAA problem. That would be Arrogant Asshole Athletes for the slow among you. Somewhere in elementary school, people my age all learned to do whatever the police told you to do when you encounter them. You can get a lawyer the next day. They might be able to teach that to college athletes today, but that would require getting them into a classroom first.

I am so old that I remember when they announced the player lineups for big games, they would tell you the player's hometown and his college major. Now they announce his NIL salary figures and his favorite jail.

And that's the best in sports today!!

Dollar Store B. O.???

Yes, I am talking about that stench coming from the Democratic Party. We all know the source of that stench is Hakeem Jeffries, the leader of the House Demoncrats.

Many people refer to Jeffries as the dollar store Barack Obama. I think that is an insult to dollar stores across the land.

Jeffries is a hate-filled man who you could silence just by slapping a pair of handcuffs on him. Like gruesome, greasy Gavin Newsome, Jeffries depends on his hands to do his talking. You have to shackle him to shut him up.

In a country with millions of leftist loons scattered across the fifty states, Democrats are depending on two schmucks who live within a few miles of each other in New York City to lead their party. It's hard to believe that Brooklyn gave up the Dodgers for a couple pieces of crap like these guys. For a party with a permanent screed going about "diversity," one would think they might look for at least one leader from outside New York City. Not to mention that these two clowns spend all of their time trashing a now-former New Yorker, Donald Trump. Are Chuck "The Schmuck" Schumer and Hakeem "Dollar Store B.O." Jeffries really the best that Democrats have to offer the nation? 

My personal thanks to Schumer and Jeffries for proving that everything bad that Southerners have said about Yankees is absolute truth. 

The Dollar Store B.O. keeps talking about "maximum warfare". Is a battle of wits with an unarmed man like Dollar Store B.O. Jeffries an example of "maximum warfare"? Jeffries is just busy proving that everything that Southerners have thought about Yankees for the last 250 years is absolute truth. 

Actually, one more quick shot at B.O. Jeffries. Look online for Florida Governor Ron DeSantis's impersonation of Jeffries and his "extreme warfare" comments.

Twenty years after the world ended, Al Gore is still out hustling his climate change fraud. Al is the biggest proponent of "snapshot management" that I have ever seen.  "Snapshot Management" is when you take a view of a moment in time and extrapolate that data to fit your desired scenario. An example is when you walk into a grocery store at five o'clock on Friday afternoon and decide that this is a representative minute of their entire business month. It just doesn't work.  But that doesn't keep dumbasses like Al Gore from using this technique to frighten their donors.

Spirit Airlines shut down last night in what might have been the most easily forecast failure in the history of business. Anyone who thought that Spirit Airlines had a profitable business model needs to find a job in something unrelated to money.

Finally, a RMOL salute to Lee Zeldin, the administrator of the EPA. He carved up the purple haired Connecticut Cunt Rosa DeLauro in a Congressional hearing the other day. He proved that she had absolutely no actual knowledge of the subjects about which she spoke. Rosa DeLauro is a walking(?) case for Congressional term limits. She has been in Congress since 1991 and is on her 18th term. Not to mention that she is 83 years old.  And if that isn't enough of a reason to retire her, I offer this gem from the Internet about her relationship with Joe Biden. "She is credited with having been a mentor to his son, Hunter Biden, when he attended Yale Law School." You can't top that!!

Mayday or May Day??

 "Mayday" is the worldwide call for help. It indicates that you are in distress. You are actually supposed to say it three times, "Mayday, mayday, mayday". On the other hand, May Day is May 1. The Communist Party celebrates May 1 as International Workers Day. So, we are left to assume that all of those celebrating May Day today are Communists.

Here in North Carolina, most of the larger school systems have announced that they will not have classes so that teachers can attend a large May Day rally in Raleigh. I watched a "news report" last night where they interviewed a Charlotte teacher who said that teachers need "bonuses". Yes, and people in hell need ice water.

While our "teachers" celebrate the Communist holiday, voters/citizens should examine their claims that they need increased compensation. 

First, there is absolutely NO correlation between funds expended and educational excellence. As an example, parochial schools spent a fraction of what public schools spend and get equal or better results. Home schoolers spend even less than that and get better results. So, spending more money is no guarantee that we will get better results. It only assures that we will spend more money.

As I have ranted in this space for more than twenty years, all businesses are judged by the quality of the products that they produce. The quality of education that public school students receive is dropping by the day, month, year. You pick!! Why are the majority of public school students unable to read at grade level? Why can't public school students do simple math? I am talking about addition and subtraction, not geometry or trigonometry.

Young people are spending twelve or more years in public schools and graduating as functional illiterates. Take away their smartphone or computer and they are hard-pressed to spell their own names. I spent almost fifty years working with high school and college students and I am here to tell you, "This shit isn't working!"

I am sure that I will hear this story today, but years ago, one of my sons was training a young lady who was a high school junior, to be a cashier. She had entered the amount of the customer's purchase and the amount of cash tendered, and the register showed that the change was 53 cents. The cashier was trying to give the customer a roll of pennies (50 cents) and 3 loose pennies as their change. My son explained to her that 2 quarters was the equivalent of the roll of pennies and would be easier for the customer to carry. I am sorry, but if you are a junior in high school and don't understand how the money system operates, you are functionally illiterate. Don't waste your breath telling me that in the future we will be eliminating money. You have to be able to function today. One of my basic truths in life is this; You have to get through today, to get to tomorrow. 

There are groups putting up billboards in this area proclaiming that we need to pay public school teachers more money. Like every other employer, the public should respond to this by examining the quality of the work being done. Teachers all chose to be teachers. Nobody was drafted into teaching. Nobody was sentenced to be a teacher as some sort of plea bargain arrangement. Everybody who teaches, chose to teach. If you want to make more money, produce a better product. If you don't like the pay, get a job where you work twelve months a year and weekends.

How often are teachers terminated for poor performance? I know this will stun you, but that information is not available from the Department of Education. I can only assume that there are no "inquiring minds" in our state government.

My final point is one that I often repeat, public education is the experiment. We have been doing this a couple of hundred years. People used to all be home-schooled or educated in church schools. Newton and Galileo didn't attend public schools. Edison was home-schooled. 

Why should we keep pouring money into a broken system? No one who can't make an omelet keeps their job at the Waffle House, why should we keep paying teachers for high school students who can't read? Obviously, it isn't working. Let's go to a Plan B.

Kimmel Keeps Killing Them?? And more.

 The world's unfunniest (Is that even a word?") comedian struck again last week. Jimmy Kimmel described Melania Trump as an "expectant widow" a few days before an assassin invaded the Washington Hilton in an attempt to kill the President and members of his administration. Last night, Kimmel was trying again to explain he was only joking. 

I have never actually watched Kimmel on his alleged comedy show. It is broadcast way too late for an old guy to watch. His attempt yesterday to explain his remarks failed as miserably as the ratings of his alleged "show". I am sorry, but he just isn't entertaining. 

If you are a Kimmel follower and I can't believe that anyone reading this would be, please direct me to the videos of Jimmy Kimmel describing Jill Biden as "having the glow of an expectant widow". Let's face it. Joe Biden looks and acts much closer to death than Donald Trump. Yet, Kimmel is strangely quiet on that issue. I would ask why, but we all know that Kimmel is just another ass-licking liberal claiming to be a comedian. Did Jimmy know that Jill was the one really running the Oval Office?

I don't watch anything on ABC, so I don't even need to bother boycotting them. All you really need to know is that this is a network where the "News" department produces "The View". If they have a quality control department at ABC, there is no actual evidence that it exists. They could eliminate that group without anyone even noticing.  I'm sorry, but as an entertainment enterprise, they just suck. Does ABC even have any agenda other than hating Donald Trump?  What MBA candidate convinced them that attacking a President of the United States on an hourly basis was the road to fame and fortune? You can get back to me on that.

Nothing warms my heart like seeing a wannabe Trump assassin stripped of his clothing and lying buck naked face down on the floor at the Washington Hilton. People were actually complaining because police officers strip searched the assailant. Sorry, but they were not going to take his word that he wasn't carrying any other weapons. Hey! At least, they did throw that silver blanket thing over him as he laid there naked on the floor.

Before the attention deficit thing takes off here, let me get back to the alleged comic, Komrade Kimmel. He should be treated for Trump Derangement Syndrome by being removed from his job at ABC. He needs to join some kind of 12 step program for Commie Comics. He should prove his popularity by taking his show on the road and charging $400 or $500 a seat to listen to his swill. That way the people who are his fans can see him without the rest of us being compelled to change television stations constantly to avoid his alleged "humor". 

Spring Flings??

 Eric Swalwell, who occasionally shows up for his job as a Congressman, is living proof that shit really is everywhere. He has missed more than 60% of the votes in Congress while he travels from his home near D.C. to California to run for Governor. This guy is more than your run of the mill scumsucker!

Swalwell is not even the pick of the litter in the Democratic pool of candidates for governor of America's largest mental institution. They also have Katie Porter, the Nurse Ratched of California. If they elect Porter, they will save millions in government staffing expenses as they won't be able to find anyone willing to work for that bitch. Swalwell will squander the taxpayer's dollars by constantly ordering Chinese to be delivered to his office. This might be the year that California ends the statewide rectal-cranial inversion and elects a Republican. 

Instead of Representatives and Senators having to buy or rent homes in the DC area while they are serving in Congress, let's build a barracks complex like those on military bases where those serving in Congress can live. They could save those who are bribing them a lot of money, and we would be able to get them back to work quickly when they are needed to vote on something. They wouldn't be lingering over any four course meals in the mess hall. What kind of wine do you serve with Sloppy Joes? Why shouldn't Congress get the same level of housing that they give people who defend our freedom?

This is Masters week, in case you missed a previous rant where I discussed this. This is one of those times that I thank God for my eyesight being afflicted with color deficiency. Yes, Masters green, money green, fairway green, putting green, puke green, and Trump haters green with envy, all look pretty much the same color to me. I will pass on the egg salad sandwiches. And the pimento cheese.

The color deficiency thing also works well to respond to all of those fashion experts who want to tell me that the color of my shirt doesn't go with the color of the pants that I am wearing. We won't even get into the tie thing. Interestingly enough, this used to happen at church more often than anywhere else. Hell, I figured that they would just be glad that I was there. I have solved those problems. Now, plaid is my favorite color.

I have heard all about Jeffrey Epstein that I can take. Memo to multiple morons: The son of a bitch is dead! Let it go!! We had a brain-dead President for four years who was fascinated by young girls and liked sniffing their hair. Where were all of People's Pervert Police then? Are you investigating Biden?  Of course not. Instead, Democrats are making wild-ass claims about the only politician on record as banning Epstein from his property.  The Trump Derangement Syndrome is real and is an epidemic in the Democratic Party. Dims can't breathe without hating Trump. Trump should declare a national mental health emergency and seek funding to fight TDS. Dr. Fauci should be able to come up with some kind of mask and distancing requirements. 

I am surprised that Dims haven't voted to establish a National Day of Mourning for Thomas Crooks, the Pennsylvania shooter. And then there is former Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura, who claims that the Trump assassination attempt was staged. If you needed any more proof about the danger of steroids, Jesse has provided that for you.

There is a lot of evidence that civilization began in the area of the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers. Given the continuing struggles in the Middle East, one might place a winning bet that civilization will end in that same area.

Two Week Timeout??

Pope Leo has criticized President Trump over his statements about destroying Iran if Iran does not agree to end the war. The Pope has also the urged Israeli President Isaac Herzog to end the war, urging him to "reopen all paths of dialogue". No word on whether or not the Pope has communicated with the Ayatollah of the Week about ending the war by stopping attacks on Israel and the Gulf countries.

Iran has started the ceasefire by firing missiles at Israel. Apparently, the camel riding messengers in Iran haven't yet made their way to all of the military outposts with news of the ceasefire.

Democrats are all screaming for the 25th Amendment to be invoked and Trump removed from office. Apparently, the Democrats were okay with Rip Van Winkle Biden sleeping through his four years at the White House.  Here's a complete list of every Democrat who called for Biden to be removed via the 25th Amendment. 1.   2.   3.   4.  5.   

Calling Democrats "Drama Queens" is an insult to real "drama queens" everywhere. If Democrats will just save all of those faces for Halloween this year, it will be a good time for Trick or Treaters.

Democrats claim to be shocked by Trump's language. Do they ever listen to what they say themselves? Are they just stupid? Is it all just lies?  Is there anything that Democrats don't say for political purposes?

Just for shits and grins, let's put some Democrats on trial for treason. We could sell tickets to benefit the war effort against Iran.

The Masters Golf Tournament is this week. If you think that I even care about that, you are evidently a first-time reader. The good news about the Masters is that once having sold your home and children to buy tickets on the open market, the concessions are at 1970's price levels. You can get a pimento cheese sandwich for $1.50. That's just another reason for me not to go.

I can't believe that anyone will even attend the Masters without Tiger Woods in attendance. He won't be there because they don't let the players use golf carts. That and he purports to be in some foreign country getting privacy and a rehab program for a drug problem that he claims not to have.

I saw a clip the other day where a Fox News personality was claiming that the only thing Tiger had done wrong was to be distracted by his phone. He claimed that Tiger had a prescription for the pills found in his pocket. I made a note not to watch anything that person would be appearing on in the future. 

Woods rolled his car in a 30 MPH zone and failed a field sobriety test and refused a urine test. Direct me to another time in history that someone rolled a car on that street while going the speed limit. Golf skills notwithstanding, Tiger Woods is a lousy driver. He was seriously injured in a single car accident when he ran off the road at high speed in California a few years ago. In my world, we call this a "trend".

I keep hearing from liberals that bombing bridges and power plants are war crimes. WOW! What about the Twin Towers and the Pentagon? What about all of those homes and buildings in Israel being attacked after the ceasefire started? 

Memo to morons and/or Democrats: Iran has been at war with us since 1979. The best thing about that is they kept Jimmy Carter from getting a second term.

We didn't move heaven and earth to rescue a downed US flyer over the weekend because we thought that Iran would treat him well. 

Satireday

What's the point of all those septum piercings? Do the nose rings make it any easier to lead all of those liberal women around? If they would pair that nose ring with a couple of nipple piercings, you could hook up a three-point hitch to your girl.

On his television show years ago, Donald Trump used to tell people, "You're fired!" Apparently, that wasn't your average television "reality" show. Why are people surprised he still does that?

I am so old that I remember when you went to the sideshow at the Florida State Fair to see a tattooed woman. Now you just have to walk into a convenience store, school, bar, restaurant or Walmart. 

Spring appears to be here. But I live in North Carolina, so it's too early to put away the coats. There are still a couple of weeks left to squeeze in another frosty morning.

I sold some of my fine wares at a couple of flea markets last week and I can assure you that we will have a bumper crop of idiots coming in a few weeks. Who knew that "stupid" was this contagious?

Memo to Thom Tillis: If running for Governor of North Carolina is on your To-Do list, go ahead and take that shit off of your list. Sorry Thom, but you are just a little bit less popular than jock itch in your home state.

The News and Observer published a lengthy puff piece about Sir Thom Tillis of Carolina the other day. In it, they wrote about how Thom Tillis left his job at PriceWaterhouse that paid about a million dollars a year, to be a state legislator at less than $14,000 a year. Who does that? Someone who is tuned in to the hidden side benefits of being in government. The kickbacks and payoffs must be incredible. But of course, no one questioned that in the article. I won't say anything profanely bad about the writer, but when Thom Tillis farts, that writer is the first one to know. 

When a single Senator can block a US Attorney or Federal Judge appointment, democracy is officially on life support. Yet that is the system employed in the United States Senate. It's time to bring democracy to the United States Senate. End the filibuster! End the blue slip system! Term limits for Senators are needed. End Congressional pensions!! People shouldn't go to Washington as a lifelong career choice. 

It's time to throw in the towel on professional politicians. It's time to stop letting Congress make the rules about what Congress can do. Isn't that the old wolf watching the hen house story?

Mercifully, we are down to the last couple of games in the NCAA basketball tournament. Or America's biggest gambling event, whichever you prefer. I will watch basketball when they move to basket to 12 feet high and they start calling "traveling" again. There are NFL running backs averaging fewer yards per carry than basketball players.