Democrats, Dummies and the DOD

 Democrats are those kids in your class who didn't listen when the coach told them, "It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game that counts." The liberal turds heard not a word.

Merrick Garland's next job will be "officially" working for the Democratic National Committee. His paychecks will actually have his name on them instead of just being made out to "Cash".

I got a call from Hakeem Jeffries wanting to know if I would call Nancy Pelosi and tell her that her job as Speaker of the House is actually over. Hakeem said that the worst part is where he has to sit on her lap while she makes him talk. She told him that he is a better puppet than "Joe the wonder President". They call him that because he keeps wondering if he is still President. 

The Democratic fundraising machine is in disarray with the Harris campaign. I am sure of this because I received a fundraising email asking me for a donation to the Harris campaign. I would have thought that the "mensareb" in my email address would have weeded out the scum. It turned out that an alleged "friend" had entered my email address responding to some liberal email. That's not a problem for me. Wait until the porn starts showing up in the email account that he and his wife share.

In a late update about the campaign financial situation, the Democratic National Committee has laid off hundreds of permanent and temporary workers. Maybe Oprah can give them all jobs?

If you don't think that Democrats have lost touch with reality, turn on the television for about ten minutes on a Sunday morning. It has been less than two weeks since they had their asses handed to them in the national elections, but to hear them tell the story you would think that they had won the election.

Democrats scream about the need for experience in government officials, but this nation has elected forty-four men who had no previous experience as President to their first term as President.

Matt Gaetz has never been an Attorney General. Democrats claim to be afraid that he will be worse than Merrick Garland. How is that possible? Maybe if Gaetz had been first nominated to the Supreme Court? Then, maybe he could suck as badly as Garland. Ma Garland is on the last couple of months of his "Communist Revenge Tour" against the United States because he didn't get a seat on the Supreme Court. He needs to be sentenced to four years on the View where he can be surrounded by a pack of morons who think like he does.

Democrats don't think that Pete Hegseth could do the job of Secretary of Defense. If Pete knows how to call in sick when he's in the hospital, he's ahead of Lloyd Austin. We don't need any more generals and admirals to run the DOD. Eisenhower warned us about the military-industrial complex almost 64 years ago. Even a Democrat could have figured that out by now, but they haven't. 

The military brass and the defense contractors have a relationship that meets all of the legal standards for "incest". This leads to the birth of things like $600 hammers and $10,000 toilets. The symbol of the DOD inefficiency is the Pentagon. I am talking about the actual building. Colonel Potter on "MASH" described it as a building with "four walls and a spare".  It would have been cheaper to build a headquarters that was rectangular, but they wanted something that looked fancier. That has been their policy for everything almost forever.

In 1935 Gen. Smedley Butler wrote a short book called "War is a Racket". Unless your lips move while you read, you can finish it in two or three visits to the bathroom. It's been ninety years since Butler wrote the book, but reading it is like listening to Elon Musk talk about the government today. The more that things change, the more that they stay the same.

My last thought on defense contractors involves Nikki Haley and Boeing. Haley supported Boeing when she was a state legislator and as governor of South Carolina. After leaving the Trump Administration, she took a position on the board of directors at Boeing. She broke with Boeing just a short time before deciding to run for President in 2024. Incest is best? It's not just for generals anymore!

Is this the "Best of America"?

 A few days ago, Hakeem Jeffries, the alleged Democrat House leader, criticized Donald Trump's picks for Cabinet positions. He asked, "Is this the best of America?" Before Trump even considers answering Jeffries, I offer this view of Hakeem Jeffries' and Joe Biden's "Best of America".

Chuck is Bi???

 Chuck "The Schmuck" Schumer has announced that he is now "bi". Not bisexual, as that announcement would have gay people around the world vomiting uncontrollably, but he is suddenly a champion of, brace yourself, "bipartisanship". Yeah, I can't believe it either. 

Before November 6, Chuck the Schmuck was everywhere telling us how he and his Dimocrat buddies in the Senate were going to remake the nation. He was going to overhaul the US Supreme Court and pass a law legalizing abortion. Chuck and his band of thieves, also known as Senate Dimocrats, were going to remake America in their image. WOW!! Like we don't have enough crooks to deal with in our daily lives anyway.

Sadly enough for Chuck, he woke up on Wednesday, November 7 to the sound of Maureen McGovern singing "There's got to be a morning after". Not only did the Dims lose the Senate, but they also lost the Presidency to some guy named Donald Trump. Chuck should have more attention to Trump when Trump spoke at the Al Smith Dinner in New York.

This week Chuck came out of the liberal closet with his message of bipartisanship. He told Republicans that they needed to work with the Dims in a bi-partisan effort. He warned them of the dangers not working with the other party. Chuck must have seen that vision when the national news showed that Republicans had at least 51 Senate seats in the new Senate. 

Chuck is a pretty high IQ guy. If he weren't a flaming liberal, he might be working for Trump in his new administration. If pigs had wings, they might be able to fly. 

I would like to offer Chuck a few pointers on how to be more bipartisan than where he currently sits. First, get a real pair of glasses. Quit hanging those Dollar Tree reading glasses on the very end of your nose. Whoever told you that was a good look must have been a Harris campaign strategist. Go to an actual ophthalmologist and get a comprehensive eye exam. Then get a real pair of glasses and wear them closer to your eyes than your nostrils. They are glasses, not a snorkel.

Beyond that, get in a twelve-step program for recovering assholes. Yes, you too can learn to get along with people outside of your political stratum. Take a trip to the South. Go to a Waffle House at 3:00 AM on a Saturday night. You will gain more knowledge of actual Americans in an hour than you have in the last few decades that you have spent in DC.

Stick to what you know. Pictures of you at a grill putting cheese on raw burgers don't exactly build your credibility with average Americans. Nobody who walks upright believes that you know your way around a grill. If you need some cooking lessons, feel free to call me. I wouldn't even charge you for the lessons, I would just settle for the fun of sharing the stories. 

Last, but certainly not least, give someone else the chance to lead. You don't have all of the answers, and it is starting to show. We have had enough of you and Mitch McConnell to last a lifetime. I don't believe that the Founding Fathers expected people to spend more than half their lives in the Senate. There is something that you can change, and Americans will support, term limits for Congress. Give it some thought Bi-Boy!

To The Gaetz of Hell?

 Yesterday, President Trump caused liberal heads across the nation to explode. As I write this, leftists across the land are bursting into flames as the news of the appointment of Matt Gaetz as Attorney General spreads. Based on reports from alleged media sources like MSNBC and NPR, Satan has been nominated to be the new US Attorney-General.

Let me be honest here, I don't like Matt Gaetz. I don't like him because I think that he is better at asking questions than he is at answering questions. He is better at identifying a problem than at solving a problem. Gaetz is a bomb thrower, not a problem solver. But having said that, I think that is what we need right now at the Department of Justice. The Department of Justice needs to be turned over and shaken to see what falls out. I believe that Gaetz is the man to do that job.

What are those who oppose Gaetz afraid of him doing? Are they afraid that he will illegally appoint a "Special Prosecutor" to harass a former President? Forget about Biden, let's find out how the Obamas and the Clintons have become multi-millionaires after not having a pot to piss in before going to the White House. Will Gaetz use the DOJ in that capacity? Sadly, the answer is no. Will the Gaetz DOJ track down and charge every American who demonstrates against Trump at his inauguration? Will he do what Ma Garlnd did with the January 6 demonstrators? Of course not. Will Gaetz use the DOJ as Trump's personal law enforcement agency to punish his political enemies? Hell, that's what Democrats are worried about! After Ma Garland and his boys using the DOJ to punish the opponents of Democrats for the last four years, they are afraid that Trump is appointing Gaetz for the same reason. According to Dims, it's only wrong when a Republican does it.

Liberals are complaining about the quality of Trump's selections for appointees. Admittedly, Trump has not appointed a transexual as Surgeon General yet, but there is still time. Trump has not appointed a luggage stealing cross dresser to handle the disposal of spent atomic fuels, but Democrats are still holding out hope. Dims have given up hope on another hopeless incompetent heading up the Department of Homeland Security, but they are trying to hurry more of their immigrant followers across the border into our country before January 20. 

Bookies are reportedly taking bets on when Donald Trump will fire Chris Wray at the FBI. I checked, but all of the times on the afternoon of January 20 were already taken. Democrats are stunned that Trump would fire Wray, the man who sent FBI agents to search Melania Trump's underwear drawer at Mar-A-Lago. Republicans understand that it's not whether Trump will fire Wray, it's only when Trump will fire him. There are news reports that Wray will resign if Trump tells him that he wants him gone. I hope that doesn't happen as I have already placed bets on a couple of times on January 21.

But back to where I started this screed, let's hope that the US Senate has the balls to confirm Matt Gaetz as Attorney General. Or is Trump just setting them up to confirm his second choice for Attorney General? By that point, they will vote for anyone as long as it's not Gaetz.

Election Post Mortem

 In what may be viewed as the world's biggest participation trophy, Kamala's communications director said that Joe Biden should resign, and Kamala should be made President for the next couple of months. This is just another example with how out of touch with reality that Femocrats actually are now. Just for the record, "Femocrats" was actually a typo, but I thought that it hit the spot, so I left it uncorrected.

The Harris campaign paid Harpo Productions, Oprah Winfrey's company, one million dollars to "produce" an interview with Kamala. This helps explain why Oprah finally endorsed a candidate for President. No previous candidates had found the price for endorsement worth the money. There really is one born every minute. Let the record show that the only Presidential candidate ever endorsed by Oprah lost in a landslide. The Harris campaign would have been better off if they had paid Harpo Marx Productions for an endorsement. Kamala, of course, claims that Harpo's brother Karl endorsed her for free.

A week after election, California is still counting ballots. It doesn't take the Russians that long and they are faking them. The state that is the home of Silicon Valley can't figure out how to get election results counted in less than a week. What's wrong with that picture?

Doug Emhoff has lost his bid to become the First Gentleman to knock up the nanny.

Tampon Tim Walz will not become the worst Vice President in history. Folks in Minnesota claim that he remains in the running for worst governor of Minnesota. Somewhere in purgatory, George H.W. Bush is ridiculing Democrats for laughing at Dan Quayle.

With Kamala's bid to become President, there goes her plans to enlarge the wine cellar at the White House. There was a picture of her the other day playing with her two nieces while a glass of wine sits nearby. That explains why nobody ever asks her to babysit. What's the correct wine for babysitting?

The Harris campaign raised a billion dollars and still ended up twenty million bucks in the hole. Maybe Oprah can put on a telethon to raise the twenty million (plus her telethon planning fee)?

Anyone who thinks that Joe Biden is going to resign and let Kamala become President must have not seen Jill Biden in that MAGA red pantsuit at the polls on Election Day. Jill will spend the next 69 days giving Joe mouth-to-mouth and propping him up in front of the cameras before she will let Kamala become President. The spirit of Edith Wilson lives!!!

Kameltoe's Kampaign spent $100,000 to make a hotel room in Washington look like the set of the "Call her Daddy" podcast. How much was airfare to the actual location? That's probably $90,000 more than the actual studio cost to build. 

While the total that Kameltoe raised and actually spent is absurd, there is good news. To her credit, she never promised to balance the budget. As least, that is what MSNBC is reporting.

There's a rumor this morning that Trump has picked Kristi Noem to head up Homeland Security. If you are an illegal, hide your dogs!!

More Reflections on Elections

 It's Friday night and if you are a Democrat, Kamala Harris still has fewer votes than Donald Trump. Weep at your leisure.

Kameltoe raised more than a billion dollars and lost. Even after raising a billion dollars, she still owes twenty million or so. Her cost per vote is probably a new record.

Kameltoe spent $100,000 to make a hotel room in Washington look like the studio of the "Call Her Daddy" podcast. She didn't want to have to travel.  I guess that was why she didn't appear on Joe Rogan's show.

It now has turned out that Kameltoe was paying all of these celebrities to appear at her rallies. They wanted more to sing. This proves that there really is one born every minute.

Is Donald Trump going to set up an "Office of the President-Elect" like Joe Biden did in 2020?

If you think that Jill Biden wearing a MAGA red pantsuit to the polls on Tuesday was an accident, you need to e-mail me for more info on oceanfront property. Memo to Dems: Piss off an old guy at your own peril. Don't even think about pissing off his wife. 

While Kameltoe was holding a rally on the Ellipse, Biden was on a Zoom call talking shit about her. Didn't anybody have the job of guarding Joe?

The White House continues to maintain that Joe Biden is not going to pardon Hunter Biden or commute his sentence. Joe Biden is going to pardon Donald Trump. Trump will pardon Hunter Biden and Joe. It's not as outrageous as you might think at first. You heard it here first!!

Bob Woodward peaked in 1975. If he was a horse, we would have put him down by now. Somebody please put him and us out of our misery. Nobody under fifty knows anything about Watergate. We won't notice if Bob turns up missing or at a Harris rally. 

Liberal universities are trying to help their students make it through the crisis of watching Donald Trump win the election. They need to send the little bastards home to have Mama comfort them.

Who watches a television show where the hosts keep calling you stupid? Obviously, Democrats are all graduates of the Don Rickles School of Politics. They are just going to insult you until you vote for them. Maybe next time, guys!!

The Morning After the Morning After

 Today is the morning after the morning after the election. Memo to self: Old guys should not stay up until after 2:00 AM watching election results and expect to be able to function the next day. Whether I remember that in four years is up for debate.

So, here are a few thoughts on the 2024 election results. Liberals are blaming Biden for Kameltoe's loss. Maybe they should have actually held a primary elections process to pick their candidate. It's been a long time since anyone was anointed as President to lead this country. 

There were at least 15 million fewer votes cast in this year's election than in 2020. Some "fact checker" online denied this claiming that all of the votes had not been counted yet. If 48 hours after the election there are 15 million uncounted votes, something is seriously wrong with the system. 

Kameltoe received about 68.5 million votes. In 2020, Biden got about 81 million votes. So, it looks like more than 13 million Democrats stayed home this year. Either that or the Democrats padded the 2020 vote totals. Maybe there was something in the claims of those who alleged Democratic cheating in 2020?

Donald Trump, the legendary sexist and oppressor of women, has appointed Susie Wiles to be the first female White House Chief of Staff. I guess that Jill Biden didn't count.

We live in what is reputed to be the most advanced country in the world. Right now, more than 48 hours after the polls closed, we still don't have all of the results from the election. Does cheating take longer?

Democrats are engaged in that circular firing squad activity right now. It is really a lot of fun watching these guys talk shit about each other. If they really want to know who to blame, they should simply check a mirror.

According to reports from the business world, the "For Sale" sign is hanging outside at MSNBC. Russia dropped out of the bidding after the price jumped to 20 bucks. Morning Joe may be singing that old Jim Croce song, "Working at the Car Wash Blues" pretty soon.

If you are a Democrat there are some bright sides to the election debacle. Kameltoe can work out that deal with Ancestry to prove that she is more black than Liz Warren is Native American. There's a rumor that the NRA has signed a deal with Tim Walz to teach him how to load his shotgun. Greasy Gavin Newsome announced that he will wait until after Trump's inauguration on January 20 to announce his candidacy for the 2028 election. 

Maybe Kamala will run for Governor of California. Based on Newsome's performance, she is completely qualified. 

There's an old story about Richard Nixon that I first heard more than fifty years ago. In 1962 Nixon ran against Pat Brown for governor of California. Nixon was actually favored to win the race. As the results were coming in late in the evening on Election Day, everyone was surprised by the results showing Brown in the lead. After midnight, one of Nixon's aides was trying to console him by telling him how many more results were left to be counted. Nixon reportedly looked at the aide and said, "The people have spoken. F*ck 'em!" 

And that's the best in politics today.