Saturday, December 11, 2010

Sooner or later.......

This morning as I sat in the restaurant talking to "The Lovely Loretta" (one of our customers), she made a comment about a rather large woman sitting a few tables away. It seems that the whale had taken all of the coffee creamers from the table next to hers and then told the waitress that there still wasn't enough cream for her coffee. Loretta asked me something like "Can you believe that?" I responded by telling her that there was ONE undeniable truth in the restaurant business. "Sooner or later, every form of life imaginable will walk through those doors."

I manage by story telling. You have a problem?? I have a story. No matter what the issue is, by this point in life, I have seen it before. If not, I could probably just make up a story. Relax, I never have to do that.

I like to tell people that my own life is a series of one-liners:
"Does not play well with others."
"Runs with scissors."
"Does not live up to potential."
"Doesn't make friends easily."
"Does not take criticism well."

A few of my favorites from performance reviews:
"Gilbert has a penchant for profanity." (No Shit!!)
"Gil tends to be sarcastic." (WHOA!!)
"I have never worked with anyone this highly opinionated." (Is that right, asshole?)

My son had a problem with a teacher at GTCC. I told him that the problem was easy enough to see. I told him a story about Jayne Thomas, one of my high school math teachers. (It's way too long to get into here.) I explained that for me, one of the basic truths in life is that when someone asks you, "What do you think?", they really don't want to know.

What are your basic truths??


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