Monday Medley

Over the weekend, an unnamed senior government official announced that BP will replace Tony Hayward as CEO in October. Later that day, a senior BP official announced that in 2012 the United States will replace Barack Obama as their president.

On Saturday, seven men were charged in Randolph County with participating in a cockfighting ring. Six of the seven are being held for federal authorities for deportation. Maybe those folks in Arizona are on to something.

Arizona has evidently discovered that there is no need to import criminals when we have an ample supply of domestic criminals.

About forty years ago at the Waffle House in Tampa, one of our waitresses was reading a story in the Tampa Tribune about a cockfighting ring in Riverview being raided. Earlene was stunned to find out that it involved roosters.

We have an employee who dons a chef's coat and hat to promote the restaurant. He entertains passing motorists, while holding signs such as "Chef Bobby says, All you can eat pancakes. $2.49" A customer asked me one night, "Is he a real chef?" I answered his question with one of my own, "Are those real cows at Chic Fil A?"

We celebrated "Christmas in July" at the restaurant yesterday. I was trying to explain this to a customer when she asked me, "Is that why there is a Christmas tree in the lobby?" Yes, and that will also explain why that man over there is dressed as Santa.

I love online language!! I don't understand it, of course, but that's another story. I got a message telling me that I needed to "friend" someone on Facebook. I'm old, "friend" is a noun, not a verb. I miss Alexander Haig. That guy could turn nouns into verbs quicker than I can cuss. Haig could spit out acronyms and abbreviations at the speed of sound. If he were alive today, he would be teaching all those BFF's, WTF's, OMG's, and LOL's how to communicate. I'm in charge here!!