Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Road Trip Rant

A few weeks ago, I made my regular trip to Ft. Walton Beach to visit my mother. A few thoughts from my trip.

Attention Highway Planners!!! Make my life easier and put in a lane for those of us willing to drive somewhere near the speed limit. About one more asshole riding my bumper while I drive in the right lane, and I'm going to be the poster boy for road rage.

In my travels, I have seen roads, bridges, and even interchanges named after someone. In South Carolina, I stopped to get gas and drove past a sidewalk named after someone. I can see it now. "Make a right after you pass the Gilbert Jones sidewalk."

But South Carolina is the state where they give out all of those warning tickets for walking on the wrong side of the highway. I got one of those when I was twelve. That's a story for another day.

In South Carlina I passed some porn shop, pardon me, adult bookstore, located next to I-85. Only in the heart of the Bible Belt would you locate a porn shop by the busiest road in the state. I don't know about you, but if I ever get the urge to visit an "adult bookstore", I want a little more privacy. Who wants all of their friends and relatives to see them carting a stack of movies and toys out of that place? What the hell, it is South Carolina.

Atlanta. One day I am going to invent a time travel machine. When I do, I am going back in time and get Gen. William T. Sherman. I am taking his butt to Atlanta and tell him to finish the job this time.

HOV lanes?? It DOES NOT stand for honkey operated vehicles. Irritated by the number of vehicles in the HOV lane with one occupant passing me, I started keeping count. In about an hour, 41 cars with one occupant passed in the HOV lane. Four (4) had white male drivers, one (1) had a white female driver. To prevent any misunderstanding of this data, the other vehicles had live drivers, not remote control. I can't decide if the 41 violators could not read or could not count. Nah, that's just one of those laws that applies to other folks.

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