Thursday, July 31, 2008

Nitwits, Nascar, and The Breck Girl

NASCAR tried to hold a race at Indianapolis Sunday but couldn't get the tires to cooperate. It's a long day when you are trying to run 400 miles but the tires will only last 20 miles. The finger pointing started about lap 15 and hasn't ended yet. I'm not a big NASCAR fan but a few thoughts on the matter:
1. Do you guys ever really test this stuff?
2. NASCAR should have called the race instead of changing tires every 10 minutes. They would have received better press by refunding every one's money than by staging a tire changing contest and calling it a race.
3. This is what NASCAR gets for going racing in Yankee land. This Sunday, they will be at Pocono. The last time that there were that many Southerners in Pennsylvania, they were at Gettysburg. Didn't turn out any better there.

Stock car racing hasn't been the same since they stopped running anything that looked like a real car. The only similarity between a real Chevy Impala and Jeff Gordon's racecar is the Chevy logo.

How about finding a driver with a personality? These guys all fall from the same mold. They climb out of the car, put a ball cap on, hold the drink they are endorsing, and babble some crap like "The Random Moments of Lunacy Chevrolet really ran strong out there today."

The National Enquirer is after the Breck Girl. Apparently John Edwards turned up at a hotel in Beverly Hills to visit his mistress and their "love child". I don't believe that John would do that. I still think that he's gay but I may be wrong. However, his alleged mistress does bear a striking resemblance to Prince Charles' wife Camilla. Maybe it was a striking resemblance to Mr. Ed.

In Greensboro, the Guilford County School Board has chosen a new superintendent. Torn between a woman who is the superintendent of the Scotland County system and a lawyer who is an administrator for the Charlotte system, they went with the lawyer. Only a school board could rationalize hiring a guy without any training in education to run a school system. I guess that they are going with the "Things can't get any worse" scenario.

From the e-mail files:
“Barack Obama wrote a prayer to God which he placed in Jerusalem’s Wailing Wall last week. The prayer note was retrieved by a seminary student and published in an Israeli newspaper. Everybody in Israel wanted to know if it was addressed, ‘Dear Dad’.”

Good News for McCain!! The famed rapper and racist Ludicrus has released a new (pick one of the following: rap, song, poem, rant, tirade, ode, groan, moan) endorsing the Messiah and attacking Hillary Clinton. Maybe she gave up too soon. Ludicrus, who would be bussing tables if there were not throngs of morons paying to hear his swill, is apparently unaware that Hillary is out of the race.

There is no truth to the allegation that John McCain has challenged Obama to do the "loaves and fishes" thing on live television.

Obama drew a huge crowd in Germany. Mr. Obama, with his background in Chicago politics, thinks that those folks can vote for him in November.

In another sign that the Demoncrats have written off the South, they have told caterers not to serve fried foods at their convention in Denver.

In the Chinese manufacturer can come through in time, I will be in Denver for the Demoncrat Convention. I will be selling the limited edition, Jesse Jackson endorsed,"nut cutting" knife. It slices, it dices, ................

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