Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The High Cost of Sex

It's time to discuss the high cost of anything other than gasoline. Let's try the unbelievably high cost of sex. The escapades of former New York Governor Elliot Spitzer brought this to every one's attention. Elliot was reported to have engaged the services of a young prostitute at the rate of $1000 an hour. A thousand dollars an hour?? What an outrage! Who does this girl think she is, an attorney? Is she a doctor? Is she a politician giving a speech? No, she's just a hooker or "sex therapist".

What can a prostitute do that is worth $1000 an hour plus whatever she gets from the minibar in the room? Frankly, for that kind of money she should be on CNN the next morning, telling the world, "That was the biggest one that I have ever seen". She should fake an orgasm that would be nominated for an Oscar. She should be hanging out the hotel window screaming, "Girls, get up here and get you some of this!" There are no reports that Mr. Spitzer's "sex therapist" did any of these things. News reports did include descriptions of the "sex therapist's" tattoos. The tattoos neither mentioned Mr' Spitzer's sexual prowess nor the size of his schlong, so they were of no benefit to him.

Mr. Spitzer's spending for sex pales in comparison to the amount paid by Sir Paul McCartney. Paul recently divorced his wife of some four years with a settlement of a little more than 48 million dollars. Rounding everything off to make it easy, Sir Paul paid approximately one million dollars a month for companionship. Remember, this is only the divorce settlement cost. It does not include the money actually spent during the marriage. One million dollars a month is $1389 an hour, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The meter never stops running. What about just the high cost of sex? Let's suppose that Sir Paul and Ms. Mills had sex EVERYDAY and let's further suppose that they spent three hours a day doing it. Three hours? Yes, sometimes the Viagra takes longer to wear off. At that rate, sex costs $10,959 per hour. That makes Mr. Spitzer's young lady look like she came from the Dollar Tree.


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