Thursday, August 11, 2011

Baby Mama Blues and more

I'm sitting at Gil's Military & More in downtown Reidsville looking out the front window at the future of our country. There's a young man looking at a rack of books out on the sidewalk. He (?) is carrying a hand bag and a pair of flip flops. He's wearing a pair of shorts, that are actually knicker length, and what appear to be purple boxer shorts. He's not wearing a shirt, though I wish that he were. His nipples are pierced and he has a necklace with a medallion that appears to be hood ornament size. I think that I am going to throw up!! Wait, he has turned around. The back is no better! He has two huge tattoos, one on his upper back and one at his lower back at waist level. I'm going to the back of the store for a few minutes until he's gone.

My shopper is gone. I was afraid that he would come into the store. What are the odds I could wait quietly while he shopped? Where's that "No Brains, No shirt, No service" sign when I need it??

From the good news department, the price of gas is dropping. At a station near home, it is $3.49. Who would have ever thought that we would be excited by $3.49 gas? Only an Obama supporter.

Tiny Tim, one of my dishwashers, has a fetish for women in XL and XXL sizes.Timmy may weigh 120 pounds, soaking wet.  He has 6 children by 5 different women. One of his women has taken to hanging out at the restaurant. She comes in and sits for two or three hours at a time. When I arrived yesterday, she was waiting in the lobby for him, an hour before he was scheduled to leave. She had already been in for a few hours that morning. I tried to explain to her that she was a distraction factor for him and was interfering with his job performance. I told her that she should limit the time that she is there waiting for him. She told me that she was "his baby mama" and she would come in whenever she wanted. WRONG ANSWER!! I sent for Tim and a manager and when they arrived, I explained our new policy. Tim needs to convince her not to come to the restaurant and if she does the manager needs to call the police and have her removed. It's bad enough that my tax dollars are spend supporting a whale whose only work seems to be birthing babies, I don't have to put up with her causing problems at work.

In a related note, it should be against the law for obese people to receive food stamps. There's  a great scene in "The Crossing" where Col. Glover tells Gen. Knox, "In an army that hasn't eaten in three months, its damn near treason to be fat."

Congress says that they are going to tackle the job crisis just as soon as they get back from the Labor Day recess. If you are unemployed, hang on for just another month or so. Then you will still be unemployed, but at least they will be thinking about you. Remember that in 2012!


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