Tea Party??

In my last post I mentioned "my most conservative friend". I received an e-mail from my friend thanking me and saying "tell that to the Tea Party". I thought about it and decided to do just that.

First, a disclaimer, I'm not and have never been a Tea Party member. So why I am writing about the Tea Party? It's simple. These folks are running around acting like they have received some kind of vision from God that the rest of us are not privy to. They are like people who have quit smoking, quit drinking, or have gotten religion. They think that they are the first to have these thoughts or express these opinions. Here's a news flash for Tea Partiers, I was a conservative when many of you were still in diapers and sucking your thumbs.

To hear the Tea Party tell it, people like my "Most Conservative Friend" and I have been wandering in the wilderness for the last forty years waiting for some schmuck in a tricorn hat to direct us out. I have news for you guys!! First, I have my own tricorn hat (It's in the picture). Second, I wasn't lost. I don't need a clown in a tricorn hat trying to give me directions. I'm a guy!! I don't want, need, use, or accept directions. I'm looking for leaders. Write that down!

I'm tired of being attacked by Tea Party types for not being conservative enough. It reminds me of the good old days in the Sons of Confederate Veterans. One day, some nut case described me as a "liberal". Never at a loss for words, I told him that his definition of a liberal was someone who didn't believe in slavery. The discussion was over.

Tea Party people who tell my friends that they are not conservative enough are over-reacting to cover up their last twenty or thirty years spent as liberals and moderates. By the way, I would rather know a liberal than a moderate. At least, a liberal believes in something. Moderates just want everybody to be their friends.

So if you are a Tea Party person and want to accomplish something, here are a couple of pointers. First, help build an organization. Obama won the last election because he built an organization. It was an organization of morons, but it was an organization. My most conservative friend worked at Republican Headquarters five or six days a week during the last election. My friend was not surrounded by Tea Partiers during that time. Building an organization takes more than showing up at rallies with funny signs. A Democrat can write a funny sign.

Second, if you folks in the Tea Party are serious about success within the Republican Party, do this. Learn to "Play Nice." I'm not real good at that, so if I am having to point this out to you, you suck at it. Quit attacking the rest of us for not meeting YOUR standards for conservatism. I really don't care if you want to get along or not. Why? Because in a few years, I will still believe in what I do today. You guys will have gone back to being moderates.