Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Wet Nerd Thoughts

What's a cold, rain-soaked nerd thinking at 5:30 when he's about a mile and a half from home??

1. Rain jacket, I should have worn the *#*#@*## rain jacket. Too late now to do anything about it.

2. Do you stay drier if you run faster or slower? We considered this question as a project in Physics class in high school. Fifteen groups, fifteen different results. There are way too many variables. My result today was, you would stay drier if you wore a rain jacket. Still too late!

3. Givers vs. Takers. Yeah, I know that's a big jump from cussing the rain jacket, but that's what happens when you start thinking at 5:30 A.M in the cold.

A casual acquaintance of mine has a rant that starts something like this. "There are two types of people in this world, producers and users. We demonize producers and lionize users. Then we wonder what the hell is wrong with the country." From that point he can go on as long as you have the capacity to listen. I have actually listened to most of his rant. I have a diatribe about givers and takers, it's the same story, just different labels.

This morning as I was running faster trying to stay dry, I was reflecting on an experience from early last year. I had taken some things over to the other T & S in High Point. I had to pick up some guest checks there and bring them back to Greensboro. I loaded the guest checks into my van and went back inside to get a drink. The manager told me that a waitress had asked him why he didn't help me carry those boxes to the van. He told her that if I wanted help, I would have asked him or told him. He also told her that if he had tried to help me, I would have just taken the boxes out of his hands with a simple "Give me those *#@#@*#@ boxes!!" He was probably right.

A couple of weeks ago, I did a couple of small favors for a friend. While this may stun many, I frequently try to help people, but in a low key style. My business image as a grouchy old bastard would suffer if word got out that I can be nice. Anyway, I did a couple of small favors and received a nice "Thank you" e-mail. A couple of days later, I was talking to this friend and was told "Don't do me any more favors, it makes me uncomfortable when people do things for me." I was stunned, it wasn't like I had painted a house or done something big.

This morning as I tried to stay dry, I thought about the two situations. Was my friend's reaction really any different from my own when someone tried to do something for me?? No, not really. Maybe we are both wrong. Can we allow others to do something for us without alarms going off? Is it okay for us to let our guards down so that others can experience the satisfaction of helping someone else? People who are takers need to experience the joy of giving. Maybe as givers, the best gift that we could give would be the opportunity to allow a taker to become a giver. Let's let our guards down and see what happens. There isn't always an ulterior motive for someone to do something nice. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

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