IHA?

 No, I didn't misspell "aha". IHA means "I hate acronyms". As you read this, somewhere some Generation Z reader is trying to find "IHA" on Google. I touched on this subject a couple of weeks ago, but I put off writing until I received an e-mail the other day that brought the issue back. Before I get too far into this topic, acronyms are technically sets of initials that are pronounced as a word. NASA and EPCOT would be good examples. Things like LOL and ROI are technically abbreviations or as Merriam Webster says "initialisms". So, "IHA" can stand for either "I hate acronyms" or "I hate abbreviations".  You are on your own on initialisms.

 A couple of days ago I got an e-mail from someone advertising a seminar about using humor in business. It featured the author of a book titled "The ROI of LOL". I deleted the e-mail before reading anymore.

Before smartphones and texting began in earnest, the Pentagon was the center of the acronym universe. In the early 1960's, my stepfather was stationed at MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa. He was assigned to US Strike Command and was in the CSE, Communication Support Element. I heard several of his co-workers describe CSE as "Chicken Shit Element". That was the least offensive of their descriptions. One of the most popular was obviously coined before "Don't ask, don't tell" came along. This was long before the Pentagon sold their soul to seeking recruits with two mommies. And I won't cite that one here!!

How about "LGBTQIA+"? That started out as LGBT and grew from there. It is now seven letters and a symbol. Wouldn't it be quicker to just say "queer"? That's actually one of the words in it.

A few weeks ago, I received a comment that started "FWIW". Off to Mr. Google to find out that it meant "For what it's worth". 

One of Shakespeare's most famous lines is "what light through yonder window breaks?" Would anyone remember that line if Will had written "WLTYWB"? Of course not.

I am told that BTW stands for "by the way". A pastor acquaintance claims that BTW actually means "Believe The Word."

LMFAO is reported to mean "Laughing my "f*****g ass off". If I am going to cuss, I want you to know! I am not going to use acronyms, abbreviations or initialisms or asterisks.

My older brother spent some time in the US Navy. He spent most of that time at Atlantic Fleet Headquarters in the Communications Department. He was the master of acronyms when he left the navy. He couldn't tell a story without someone asking him to explain an acronym. I gave up understanding and just laughed when he did.

One of the oldest acronyms/abbreviations is FORD. It's on millions of cars and trucks. I have heard that it stands for "Found On Road Dead" or "Fixed or Repaired Daily". There are others but I don't want to start the profanity this early in the day.

The guy who claims to be my only friend used to be a pilot for USAIR. They have become American now because everyone knew that USAIR stood for "Unfortunately Still Allegheny In Reality". There's a mouthful. 

Not to be outdone, Delta means "Doesn't Ever Leave the Airport".

The DNC convention is going on this week in Chicago. Will this be a rerun of the 1968 convention? Only if DNC stands for Democrats Never Change. So, that is a probably.