I'm so old......

 My birthday rolls around in a few days, and I thought that I would share a few thoughts with readers on this relatively insignificant occasion.

I so old that I remember when we only had men and women. 

I am so old that I remember when we only had two genders. Of course, that was only a minute ago. There are still only two genders. Any other claims are "only make believe", Sing it with me!!

I am so old that when I was in school pronouns were discussed in English class and not Phys Ed.

I am sold I remember when they kept trying to make hearing aids smaller so that no one would see that you were wearing them. Now people are walking around with ear buds crammed into their ears and no one notices anyone with a hearing aid.

I am so old that I used to be able to spot the crazy people who were walking around talking to themselves. Now you have to see if they are talking on their "smartphone" before deciding that they are crazy. If you phone is really smart, why don't you just let it hold the conversation with the caller?

I am so old and intolerant that when I am talking to someone and they say, "I have to take this call", I just walk away. People confuse "I have to" with "I want to". Don't waste your time telling me that I am rude if you ditch a personal conversation for a phone call.

I am so old that I still believe that only men have penises and testicles. There are no women with those appendages. Period. End of discussion.

I am so old that I still believe in mental illness. Asking me to play along with someone's mental illness is not going to be a winning strategy. Sorry, I am not feeding a kid Gaines Burgers because he thinks that he is a dog. That's not a healing program.

I am so old that I still believe that "they" is a plural pronoun. 

I am so old that I still hate other drivers who think that I want to hear some "Crap Music" at 120 decibels. Just remember, the "C" in crap is silent. If you are reading this at the traffic light, I will listen to rap when you are willing to listen to David Allan Coe at 120 decibels. 

I am so old that I still believe that doctors and pharmaceutical companies started believing that transgenderism was not a mental illness when they realized how profitable that it could be for them.

I am so old that I remember when there were still some reasonable Democrats. What happened to "Southern Democrats?"

In a completely unrelated incident, yesterday near Plant City, Florida, six members of a family were killed, and one critically injured when a train hit their Cadillac Escalade at a private rail crossing marked by a stop sign and a railroad crossing sign. If you can't hear a train whistle and the noise of a train coming at you at 55 miles per hour, take the ear buds out and/or turn the music down.  It's just so sad.